Films, Fjords, and Fish Tongue

Alternate title: "Why Biting a Tongue Sucks, Even If It's Not Yours"

Ever since watching the sci-fi thriller Ex Machina, I've wanted to experience the beauty of Norway firsthand. The film, one of my all-time favorites, was partially shot at the Juvet Landscape Hotel in Valldal, Norway. As I was preparing to depart for my semester abroad, I emailed the head of the property to inquire about booking a stay at the hotel. It was pricey, and the prospect of traveling to and staying in a small Norwegian village was daunting; but three months later, as I sat in a hot tub surrounded by snow and trees and mountains and streams, I knew it was worth it.

Let me backtrack. My Norwegian adventure started in the country's capitol and largest city, Oslo. I figured if I would fly through Oslo in order to get anywhere else in the country (economically), then I should spend some time there and explore the city. I arrived in the early afternoon on a Friday and checked into my hotel. My room was like an IKEA showroom, with colorful furniture and sleek, practical designs—and it was one of the cheapest places in Oslo! (It's a very expensive city.)

It was late afternoon by the time I headed out to explore the area. First, I went to a McDonald's for a snack. I thought it would be a cheap way to silence my growling stomach, but it turns out that Norway is home to the most expensive McDonald's in the world. At least there were sweet potato fries! I can reliably report that they were very delicious.

After my quick stop, and with my trusty sidekick (Google Maps) in hand, I ventured to the Oslo Opera House. It was a pretty short walk, but it was very cold and the roads were solidly packed with slick snow. It's a wonder that, with my clumsy Knopf genes, I did not face-plant (although I was close on a number of occasions).

The Opera House's huge glass walls reminded me of the Kauffman Center in Kansas City; but the angles of the building were much sharper and geometric. It was a beautiful place, right on the water and with a nice view of the city. Inside was even cooler (and warmer). Some walls had striking triangular cut-outs with green backlight; it was like something from a spy movie. (I haven't seen many spy movies.)

The next day, after a delicious complimentary breakfast (cinnamon rolls, roasted potatoes, a meat and cheese platter, and much more), I decided to walk across town toward the Nobel Peace Center. It was my intention to actually visit the museum, but I continued to wander instead—of course taking hundreds of photos along the way. I ended up at another stunningly beautiful building, which turned out to be the Astrum Fearnley Museum of Modern Art—and I'm so glad I stumbled upon it! 

After a quick ticket price translation (130 Norwegian Krone = 16.81 USD), I decided to give the museum a chance. It was a great decision. Inside, there was a special exhibit with bizarre sculptures (some of them on the more disturbing side) made out of quite ordinary household items. In a separate building was the permanent collection, which included murals, photography, more sculptures, and my favorite part, Plaza Point—an experimental video experience with two separate projectors, old airplane seats for viewing, loose gravel, and other odd decorative features. 

I left the museum feeling refreshed and inspired. It was the perfect way to cap off my time in Oslo. (Photos below.)

After my two days in Oslo, I had a flight to Ålesund, which is a small city surrounded by the fjords of western Norway. Its airport was the closest to the Juvet Landscape Hotel; even still, I needed to rent a car to drive the one and a half hours inland to Valldal. Admittedly, I was nervous to drive in a foreign country; I hadn't been behind the wheel in two months, and I wasn't sure whether street signs or rules would be confusing. The rental process was laughably easy (smallest airport I've ever been to), and I began my drive.

It actually felt great to be on the road. I was driving a very new car with heated seats (a luxury) and built-in navigation (very necessary). My first stop was at Kiwi, a tiny grocery store in Ålesund. I later joked with my mom that half of Americans wouldn't even be able to fit their bodies in these aisles—they were that narrow. I purchased some apples, chips, and the Norwegian version of animal crackers.

From there, it was back on the road. Weaving through the fjords was a unique experience, full of breathtaking views and several long tunnels which connected different chunks of land (a very scientific way of describing the topography). During the car ride, I had my choice of six Norwegian radio stations. Many of them were playing outdated American songs. Not vintage songs or classics; I mean songs from the early 2000s that were maybe mildly popular at the time of release. Between songs, I enjoyed listening to the hosts talk in Norwegian. The language did not sound how I expected, but I'm no linguist. To me (and I emphasize again that I have no idea what I'm talking about), it seemed to have similar inflection as Italian. That left me feeling confused but oddly satisfied.

Anyway, I made it to the Juvet Landscape Hotel mid-afternoon. I was graciously greeted, given a brief tour of the property, and shown toward my room. The hotel consists of seven "cubes," each with a unique perspective of the landscape. The buildings are made of wood and feature large glass-paneled walls, perfect for enjoying the view.

My room was nice, but the view from it wasn't quite as good as some of the others. But by the time I made my way down a path to the spa area, any hint of a complaint had evaporated. With a Norwegian beer in hand (called "Fjord," which is as stereotypical as an American beer called "Freedom"), I eased myself into the steaming outdoor hot tub. I was surrounded by snow, but I was perfectly comfortable to enjoy my perfect view of the valley, river, and mountains. It was a winter paradise.

As if the hot tub wasn't relaxing enough, I also enjoyed a nice steam in the sauna. Inside the spa building, I stood in the same place the director and cinematographer of Ex Machina had stood. It was surreal to look through the glass panels into the valley and know that one of my favorite films had been in production right here. It was a view I had envied when watching Ex Machina, and it was reality for me now.

That night, I attended a communal dinner served in the main barn building. I opted out of the meal to save some money, but the chef insisted on bringing me food anyway. Dinner attendees had traveled here from all around the world—Brazil, England, Spain, the United States. I was definitely the youngest, and I tended to stay quiet (other than cracking a few jokes) as the adults (I guess I'm an adult, too?) discussed the latest global topics that my mom had probably heard yesterday morning on NPR.

The staff brought out the first course. They gave a brief background on the dish before we dug in, and I learned that not only was I about to try fish (which I don't eat), but that it was cod tongue. Yes, the tongue of a huge-ass fish. I knew I needed to at least try it because I had traveled all this way to a different country, and my hosts were being courteous enough to offer me a local delicacy. I'd being lying if I told you I didn't gag for at least a minute continually as I ate small bites of this pan-fried aquatic mouth organ. Finally, they took my plate away and brought out carrot soup, which was actually delicious. It was spiced with curry seasoning and orange zest.

The main course, which I politely but sternly declined was reindeer. Ho ho how could you?! In the last few years, I've cut beef and pork out of my diet, so a rare beef steak would have even grossed me out. But as everyone around me dug their forks into Santa's best pal, I sipped on some apple juice and looked away.

Dessert was much less frightening: a pear compote with cookie crust paired with hay-infused ice cream. No, I'm not joking, and no, I'm not making fun of Food Network's Chopped. The ice cream was actually made with local hay, and it was quite good. The pear compote was delicious, and I ate every single bite, no gagging whatsoever.

After my one-night stay at the Juvet Landscape Hotel, I hit the road again, back to Ålesund. Because I couldn't afford two nights at the Juvet, I decided to stay a night in Ålesund to wrap up my Norwegian adventure. It wasn't my first choice, but I figured why not. I should figure why not more often! After a beautiful return trip (in which I stopped multiple times to take photos of small towns and big fjords), I checked in at my third hotel. With a bit of finagling, I got a room with a gorgeous view of the harbor and distant mountains. It was only mid-afternoon, so I set out on a walk. On my way in town, I noticed a mountain with stairs leading to the top. After consulting my friend Google Maps, I found out that at the top of the hike was a nice viewpoint of Ålesund, called Fjellstua Utsiktspunkt. Say that five times fast! I can't even say it once.

The climb was easy, but I stopped often anyway to take in the increasingly incredible view. I could see the ocean, boats, islands, and all of the town. I made it to the top, and the sun was still quite high. I noticed some paths going further up the hill into a wooded area. Once again, I said why not and continued my hike. That was probably the best decision of my trip, other than the one to stay in Ålesund! It was the most beautiful walk I've ever been on, and I wish I could have shared the experience with my family's neighborhood walker-in-chief, my mom. Also, my cats—who follow us on walks—would have loved it, even if they (I'm talking to you, Bunzy) would have whined a bit going uphill.

The path was surrounded by mossy trees and boulders, and a few steps off the path in either direction led to little lookout points. At one point, I found a bench with the perfect view of the water and town below. I sat there for several minutes, basking in the moment. It's something I'll never forget.

I made my way back to the viewpoint a little before sunset so I could take more photos. (By the end of my Norway trip, I had taken 1,113 photos on my camera, plus more on my phone.) The Juvet had been spectacular, of course, but Ålesund and this hike exceeded any expectations I had, and therefore became the best part of my trip.

The next morning, I had just enough time to drive to the Atlantic Sea Park, Ålesund's aquarium, as requested by my mom. She even sent me money for the ticket, so I couldn't resist. (Thanks, Mom.) It was a relaxing and fun way to end my Norwegian adventure, and the sea otters roughhousing in the water was one of the cutest things I've seen.

That's all I have time for on this post. My boyfriend lands in Amsterdam in less than six hours! This weekend, we'll embark on the next adventure: Iceland. Enjoy photos of Ålesund below, and thank you for reading!